A Hope and A Future

Artie and I work in college ministry, and this time of year is when families are dropping off their children at campus to start a new school year now and in the coming week. It has been 10 years since I came to Davidson, and I have been able to return to campus almost every year to participate in the annual Davidson Volleyball Alumni game. I have always enjoyed getting to meet the new team, connect with other alum, and pass the ball around. We just get to play - no pressure, no competing. Lots of laughter and fun. Being 6 months pregnant this past weekend, I was not able to fully participate on the court, but I still had a blast. 

Davidson, home of the Wildcats

Left - during my time as a student-athlete on the team; Right* - Alumni game #6 as an alum, Arthur getting to play a few points

Artie and Adele had a daddy-daughter day, and I got most of the day to myself with my little Arthur. We had breakfast with the team. Got a Glacier Gulp from the coffee shop in downtown Davidson. Browsed the campus store where baby and toddler sized clothes were just a little too pricey. I told him about where I spent 6 years of my life (4 as a student, 2 as a Campus Outreach staff), where I met Daddy, where we got engaged and married. I showed him where I spent countless hours in Belk Arena, between the preseason 3-a-days, practices 6 days a week, and games on the weekends. We even played a little volleyball - they let me serve a few times, and me and my little guy got a few points! 

Artie & I became friends, got engaged and married on Davidson's campus. This is at the "kissing well" on campus on our wedding day.

Davidson College Volleyball Alumni Game 2015*

I have great memories from my time at Davidson. I have friendships that I believe will last a lifetime from there. I have been thinking recently about how I would have responded to a trial of this magnitude during those years. There is no way. Too young and too immature. I would have been completely swallowed up by grief. But I see how much I have grown in a decade and I see His hand in the circumstances of my life during those years and how it prepared me to face this burden today. Looking back now, what I "suffered" through seems so small, but at the time it felt much heavier. My four-year struggle with academics at Davidson - it seemed that no matter how hard I tried, my grades didn't rise like I would have hoped. Friends and teammates all had boyfriends, and feeling lonely in my singleness up against all the couples around me through most of college, and that was hard. And while I love the girls and coaches I had the privilege of playing with, there was always some conflict - some small things and some major issues - that weighed heavy on my heart (probably any girl who has played on a sports team can relate to that).

In these years since heading to college, I could not have imagined the road I would go on and the woman I would be in 10 years. There are many things I wish I could change to have made my time easier and more comfortable. Better grades for less work. Less time on the court and the weight room. No drama. Meeting Artie earlier. But it was actually those things not happening that helped me grow and mature. Although I did not know it at the time, God used many things to get my attention, redirect my steps, and protect me from harm. Most valuable of all was gaining a hunger and desire for God's Word, which has been directing my steps since then and to this very day (Psalm 119:105).

Now while I can see the things I experienced in college helped prepare me for what our family faces today, I know the suffering and hardships I will face in this life are preparing me for the future. 

"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness." James 1:2-3 

"In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of you faith -- more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire -- may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ." 1 Peter 1:6-7

"Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him." James 1:12

and some of my teammates might remember this being up on a notecard in the locker room:

"So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light and momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

What are you facing today that is hard? Maybe it's a physical ailment. Maybe your child is being very difficult. Maybe your schedule feels overwhelmingly packed already. Maybe you or a loved one are facing death. Do you believe that it is preparing you for something? I don't always have this in mind, but when I am reminded of it through verses like these, as a Christian, I have hope. Hope that the days will not always be filled with grief like this season we are in. Hope that I am being prepared for something down the road, just like the trials in college prepared me for today. Hope that this and all that is to come is preparing me for glory, face-to-face with Jesus. 

"This is my comfort in my affliction, that your promise gives me life." Psalm 119:50

*photo by Meghan Moore, Davidson College